User:Anna Tsiolkovsky

== ANNA JUNEBUG TSIOLKOVSKY ==

Anna Tsiolkovsky has graced this page with her presence.

Vital Stats

Birthdate: 11/05/06

Resident Status: No Payment Info on File

Hair color: Blonde

Eye color: Blue

Blood type: B+

Religion: Nunchuck

Language: English

Humble Beginnings

Anna was born on November 5th, 2006, in Bear Infohub in the Bear sim. It was harsh in those days. Wars were being fought over the rights to sit upon the two chairs inside the infohub cabin, and many lives were lost for centimeters of simulated ground. The only refuge was a wall that wrapped around the main square, sitting prevented bullets and missles from rocketing one's avatar out of the grid. It was upon this wall, as she was being caged and firebombed, that Anna found her first friends in this harsh new world. They all shared a common trait: an interest in this new old world of Second Life and being riveted to their seats due to the flying cages.

It was also here that Anna found her first Leather Sofa, a piece of furniture that would follow her throughout her life. As numerous leather sofas were rezzed out by a fellow hapless newbie who didn't know how to return objects to his inventory, Anna grabbed on and placed it out, which provided much relief from the cold brick wall. It was with this Sofa that she practiced many useless skills such as rotation, position, and scaling of objects. Many a person was induced to vomit during Anna's rotation tests on the sofa. Newbies would log on every night to see the newer newbies tricked into sitting upon Anna's Magic Leather Sofa.

Within a week, the Lindens came from the heavens and outlawed all object creation and scripts, rendering Bear Infohub abysmally boring. So Anna set out into this strange new world, in the hopes of finding something that would hold her attention for more than four seconds. She always came back to Bear to roost at night, but during the day she traveled from sim to sim and island to island. She angered homeowners and security orbs, found fantastic hidden forests and dinosaurs, and got stuck in a wall because some moron set the TP point inside his house. Seriously, how much effort would it take to just move the damn wall to the side to free up the teleport point? Idiot.

Anyway, despite her wide and frequent travels she returned to Bear and struck up many topics of discussion, ranging from French foreign policy to whether you can taste liquid oxygen.

And I'm bored so I'm going to stop writing about myself in the third person now.

THE ONE AND TRUE NUNCHUCK

Many people come to me and ask, "Anna, who the hell is this Nunchuck fellow?" I forgive them their blasphemy.

Nunchuck is the One True God of Second Life. Before there was Second Life, there was Nunchuck and during Second Life there is Nunchuck, and after Second Life there will be Nunchuck. Nhe watches over us all, and when we de-rezz and go AFK forever, Nhe leads those souls who have followed Nhis Holy Will to Nher kingdom of Vivenshia, where there is no lag or prim limits. Those who disobey Nhim, however, are thrown into the sun where they forever run across the sky trying to escape their hellish thermonuclear fusion prison. Nunchuck communicates to us through the spirits known as U. It is through U that we know of Nunchuck and it is through U that Nunchuck receives our pleas and prayers. Nunchuck is all Forgiving and all Powerful and all Mightly.

Nunchuck suffers with us through our lag and our crashes, our abuse reports and our red-mapping. Nhe is hurt by all our evil and delights in our good. We are Nher creations and Nhe wants nothing more than our happiness. We hope and pray to satisfy Nhim with our love and good works, and repent for our transgressions and sins.

Go down the hall for further information.